The Currency of Cat Memes

And Now for Something Completely Different…Cat Memes!

Hi! Brian Kuo here, otherwise known as the CFO of Vape-Jet. I hope you are well. I have blog duties this month, so buckle up.

Brian Kuo hard at work sporting medieval gauntlets.
A normal Monday morning at Vape-Jet.

I have learned through experience that if I am weird enough, people will leave me alone. Unfortunately, in the game of business (in which we all need to participate to eat/pay rent/buy NFTs), human interaction is necessary. We have to call, email, and text in order to get things done. But does it always have to feel so “sales-y”? No. We can have fun. We can enjoy each other.  

To that end, when my team asked me what blog topic we should tackle next, you might (rightfully) assume it would be an accountant-y or finance-y subject. Instead, I chose INTERNET CATS.  

Cat Meme: Masterpost of cats who have a side quest for you.
I haz a side quest for you.

But, why internet cats?

Well, the purpose of this week’s topic is to relieve you from some stress. This is important because, although I find it rather appalling, we often separate humanity from business. The adage, “It’s just business, nothing personal,” is common—it is also total insanity. The two cannot be separated.  

Thus, instead of constantly “marketing” in a way that feels sterile, perfunctory, and unemotional, we should acknowledge that the world is crazy, we are a little crazy, and, therefore, we should enjoy our encounters with one another. It is not just business; it is also personal… and it is also cat memes.  

Cat Meme: If you touch my money I will cut you.
This is me when you try to sell me something.

Communicating with Cat Memes

In my experience, nothing makes people more guarded than constant business inquiries. Communication, especially in business, should reflect our personalities, our unique characteristics through which we build meaningful relationships. For example, quite a few years ago, way before Vape-Jet, I took over the account of a client who was not pleased with our services. After they sent a particularly scathing email, I took a chance, and instead of emailing them something typical and inane, I decided to take a plunge with (you guessed it) a cat meme. Seriously, the email had nothing but a cat meme on it.  

Cat Meme: Damn, it hurts right here in my meow meow.
It was something like this.

The client’s response was, “hahahahaha who the hell sent this? This is hilarious!” I replied with a sincere apology for their bad experience, letting them know I was taking over and that things would be better from there on out. We ended up having a fantastic relationship. When I failed to send internet cat memes, they demanded them. When we met face-to-face, we didn’t even talk shop—just cats and life. It was less about business and more about simply enjoying the process.  

Since humans learn from positive feedback loops, I started incorporating cat memes into everyday life. The odd part: they kept working. Soon, I was doing everything via cat meme, and it was incredibly rewarding. Booking a hotel? Cat meme. Responding to a missed text? Cat meme. Oddly, cat memes often elicit free things, such as upgrades in travel and random gifts—all due to the love of our furry companions. 

Indeed, a person’s response to cat memes can be a great indicator of what the future holds. True story: I can’t locate the email, but one time a leader of an organization emailed me back (after a cat meme, of course) and said, “Honestly, I’m more of a dog person…sorry.” Their co-founders emailed me to apologize and mentioned they were stressed. Later on, these co-founders were fired. Coincidence? I think not! Judge not the cat, lest ye be judged! I think that’s a saying. 

Some Questions to Consider

Of course, reading this post (henceforth known as ‘Brian’s Internet Thesis of Navigating Business and Life through Cats’), likely elicits corollary questions from you, dear reader, such as:  

  • Does it have to be cats?  
  • Does it ever backfire?  
  • Do you ever refrain from doing this?  
  • What is wrong with you?  

It does not have to be cats (although I am a fierce advocate for our fuzzy, meowy friends). Remember that we are all people trying to enjoy our short time on this insane blue ball flying around the galaxy. Instead of just trying to shift someone else’s money from their pocket to yours, why not laugh more? In other words, send the meme that suits you at the time—be spontaneous

I saw an ad on how to grill sunflowers, and it made me think of a post I saw on how sunflowers face each other when the sun isn't out...so I combined the two, and made this nightmarish scene.
Here is a non-cat meme I amalgamated that is now seared into your mind forever—you’re welcome.

Does it ever backfire? Unfortunately, it does on occasion. However, if you want to weed out people you don’t want to work with, it’s helpful to find out if they have a sense of humor. If not, perhaps it’s best to refer them to your nearest competitor. 

Do you ever refrain from doing this? I do refrain from cat memes at times. It’s not a good idea on many occasions, but I’ll let you judge for yourself. Trial and error are a part of life. But really, if someone does not want to do business with you just because you sent them a meme, I’d recommend avoiding them anyway.  

Now, if, after reading this, you find yourself asking, “What is wrong with Brian?” Rest assured, you are not alone. These matters constitute an expansive topic that could fill several textbooks. In fact, I invite the reader to speculate on the many things that may be wrong with me. One day, we might go over those speculations. 

So, to conclude… well, come to think of it, there isn’t really a conclusion, but the Vape-Jet team, and I hope you laughed. If you have a question about our company and how we can help, hit us up! In the meantime, contemplate the mysteries of cats, enjoy life, and appreciate interacting with fellow people. Onward and upward! 

Sincerely,  
Brian Kuo  

Cat Meme: It's dangerous to go alone! Take this.
Cat meme experience +1! You have gained a level!

Brian Rates Cat Memes

Bonus! Moar cat memes below! 

Cat Meme: Ceiling Cat
An ultra-viral cat meme. Ceiling cat watches us all participate in capitalism.
Brian exchanging cat memes with a wrong number.
Me texting with a wrong number.
Brian exchanging cat memes with his dentist.
Me texting my dentist.
Tybalt patiently sitting and watching Rick and Morty.
Brian’s actual cat, named Sir Tybalt Ham: The Prince of Cats, who he taught how to watch Rick and Morty.

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Vape-Jet Help Desk Serial Number Vape-Jet
Vape-Jet Help Desk Serial Number Jet Fueler

Where is my serial number?

On Vape-Jet the serial number is etched into the lower left corner of the door (“VJ3xx”) for version 3.0 and on a plaque (“VJ4xx”) on front panel for version 4.0.

Jet-Fueler has a sticker on the back panel and will be “JF1xx” or “JF2xx”, and so on.